Lewis Grizzard Quotes

"The game of life is a lot like football. You have to tackle your problems, block your fears, and score your points when you get the opportunity."
- Lewis Grizzard
(Related: Life, Opportunity, Football, Problems)

"Sex hasn't been the same since women started enjoying it."
- Lewis Grizzard
(Related: Women, Sex)

"It's difficult to think anything but pleasant thoughts while eating a homegrown tomato."
- Lewis Grizzard
(Related: Thoughts, Eating)

"Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and give her a house."
- Lewis Grizzard
(Related: Woman)

"If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never changes."
- Lewis Grizzard

"I don't think I'll get married again. I'll just find a woman I don't like and give her a house."
- Lewis Grizzard
(Related: Woman)

"You call to a dog and a dog will break its neck to get to you. Dogs just want to please. Call to a cat and its attitude is, 'What's in it for me?'"
- Lewis Grizzard
(Related: Attitude, Dogs, Want, Will)

"I grew up in a very large family in a very small house. I never slept alone until after I was married."
- Lewis Grizzard
(Related: Family)